Hello everybody, it's been a while.
Didn't think I would write anything in Germany, but I guess boredom and sadness didn't leave me any choice.

How are you guys out there?

It's snowing in Germany. Seems very much like it will be a 'WHITE CHRISTMAS' this year, like everyone in Germany always wishes for.
And I won't be here. Haha.

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It's the 20th of December.
Another 2 days, and it'll be this time of the year again.
Mother is returning to Frankfurt on the 22nd.
She asked me, whether I wanted to come along. You know, she has stuff to do.
Originally, I declined. But then I remembered a promise I made and couldn't keep, so I decided to go with her.
When she told me she didn't have the time (very confused here, because she asked me, whether I wanted to go with her), I told her why I wanted to come.
And she brushed it off, saying that she didn't want to do such a 'sad thing'.
I admit, it IS very sad. But it doesn't mean you can or never have to do it.

Of course, after saying that sentence, she immediately went back to talking about gossip-ish stuff.
Don't know what they talked about. Something about the sudden weight loss of my other uncle.
Honestly, I didn't want to know.

Oddly, it was a co-worker of mine in the restaurant, who saw that I wasn't alright.
I didn't tell her why.

And then, an old worker (already 50 I guess?).
She asked me why I wanted to go to Frankfurt.
Told her I wanted to visit a friend. Because I haven't seen him for 6 years now.
And she told me to bring him along with me to Karlsruhe.
I didn't respond.

I didn't tell her he was dead.

So know, I'm shutting myself into this small work-room my uncle has, trying to tune out the gossiping voices of my mother.
My horribly cold, cellphone and aspirin addicted mother.